I love you more than you do - JESSICA BINGHAM

I love you more than you do

JESSICA BINGHAM

Exhibition Statement:

In 2015, following the loss of a dear friend, I began examining the influence loss and trauma can have on our memories, connection, innocence, and joy. For many years, my studio practice was rooted in maintaining that friendship. What followed, as I carried my daughter in my womb, and most recently my newborn son, was the complexity of making work about loss while bearing new life. A bittersweet, emotional, and spiritual experience to say the least. Along that same vein, I learned the art of gardening during the COVID-19 pandemic. Tending the Earth reflected ideas of hope, struggle, perseverance, patience, and mortality that I embed into my paintings. The garden became an extension of my studio practice and has provided me with new insights on life and loss. My collaged and hand-sewn paintings honor the process of gardening, friendship, and motherhood, and are adorned with homegrown wildflowers and gifted bouquets from periods of loss and birth.

The title of the exhibition, I love you more than you do, is a phrase my daughter says to me about her believing she loves me more than I love her. It’s a sweet saying, one filled with the purest and gentlest form of competition. She truly thinks she loves me more than I love her. Perhaps in some ways she does, as the heart of a child is pure love. But as her momma I always strongly disagree with her, reminding her it’s my job to unconditionally love her. Therefore, the work in this exhibition is a love letter to her, to our new son, to our family, to our home and garden, and to our community. After struggling through a time of loss, I felt stripped of my female energy and often lost within my own inner dialogue. My daughter unknowingly kept me going. She held me together through the toughest days and allowed me to be everything I needed to be in those times, not comprehending the pain I was in. I poured love into our home and garden, and received endless support from my community. This new body of work was made while pregnant with my son, now just weeks old. These pieces reflect the sadness, joy, and hope in my life over the last two years. They are an expression to my children of how deeply I truly love them, more than they will ever know.

This project is supported with ArtsDollars funds, provided by ArtsPartners of Central Illinois, the Illinois Arts Council Agency, and the National Endowment for the Arts.